"This Means War" - stupid film redesigned by Neophytos!!!

So I was stuck in line at Walmart the other day (and my three readers already know my feelings about Walmart...) and to the side were some awful DVDs, particularly one featuring my least favorite actress ever, Reese Wither Spoon, called "This Means War". I stood there studying the image on the cover, with a photoshopped Reese flanked by two guys, the one on the left who played the second-rate Captain Kirk in the Star Trek re-launch (aka another nail in the coffin of the franchise) and the other guy was, I dunno, some other guy...

But here's the thing: the Captain Kirk guy - something about his head is wrong.  It seems to be freakishly misshapen, whereas the guy on the right, his head above the eyebrows seems to be freakishly smaller, almost as if there was a terrible transporter beam malfunction and cranial substance was swapped from one to the other.  See what I mean?

 

 

So, I decided to do something about this, and broke out trust ol' Photoshop, and made some changes.  I think what happened was, in a terrible transporter accident, the Kirk-guy had his upper-head swapped with the guy on the right.  So, like a good Scotty, I made things right and fixed the transporter accident.  Check it out...

 

 

The Kirk guy now looks like someone you'd see in a catalog while waiting to get a haircut, but at least his head seems more properly proportioned, I think.  And the guy on the right looks like a guy from my college Algebra class.  But something is still wrong... let me think....

 

Ah yeah, Reese has got to go.  To make this movie a lot better, she needs to be erased from this film, and instead, these dueling guys need to be competing for the affection of a woman with a lot more style, character, and acting prowess.  I've got it!!!