Thursday, March 28, 2013

Miami Vice Shark Jumping

Been watching some of Miami Vice on NetFlix, and it floors me how cheesy so many of these episodes are (and no one bleeds when shot, either.)  I can't figure out if the show jumped the shark when Larry Zito died, or when this dreadful episode happened...

Man, that looks like Photoshopping that I would do...

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

I'm so sick of hearing about gay marriage...

Bah, I'm sick to death of the gay marriage issue in the headlines.  Just... give this topic a rest already, AP.  Is there nothing else to talk about?

I've ranted about this issue before, but here we go again - let me get this out of my system...

- Let the government define marriage however it wants.  I don't care, because I don't recognize the State's authority on my marriage in the first place.  One of these days, I will contact the state of my marriage and have them break the CIVIL contract of it, simply because I hate the fact I need to go grovelling to the State to get it's permission to marry in the first place!  MARRIAGE IS ECCLESIASTICAL, as far as I'm concerned (and as far as history is concerned.)  If the State wants to define marriage as a man and a head of celery, so what.  The State has already defined enough things stupidly (like our international policy, involvement in the UN, drone strikes against American citizens, etc, etc) that this doesn't make any real difference to me.  Give it 10 years, and Mormons will be petitioning to have polygamy legalized.  So what.

- The men who are most vocal about homosexuality are, themselves, men with tiny nuclear families of 2-4 children, so the logical conclusion is that they've willingly had their bodies surgically mutilated so that they can no longer have children.  So in other words, they too are practicing a distorted form of sexuality (much like a homosexual) in which their practice cannot yield children as the Bible commands (Gen. 1:28, the most ignored/warped/mutilated/misinterpreted verse in the entire Bible).  God commanded Adam, Noah, Jacob, etc to be fruitful and multiply, but that doesn't matter: what he really meant was, have 2 kids, put them in a private school, mutilate your genitals and spend all your time complaining about homos.  It's just as ridiculous as a 1-2 child family saying that they are "pro-life."  Yeah right....

The state has done far more stupid things than just approving gay marriage, and I don't care about all of the hoopla over this one issue.  The State is corrupt, bloated and disgusting, so who cares...

Monday, March 25, 2013

Concussion Research Can’t Be Ignored... by Christians!

I'm developing a new theory, along the lines of other theories of mine such as 'vasectomies kill men', and the theory is this:  Christians should not in ANY WAY be involved with the "sport" of football (with only the exception of being involved with the medical service to aid players brutalized, mangled and crippled in agonizing pain from the game.)

Concussion Research Can’t Be Ignored

(I saved this as a draft, too.  Lost interest, and frankly, probably won't ever finish this...)

James Holmes’ Defense Witnesses in Colorado Shooting to Testify on ‘Mental State’

James Holmes’ Defense Witnesses in Colorado Shooting to Testify on ‘Mental State’: ABC’s Clayton Sandell and Carol McKinley report: A judge ruled Thursday that public defenders for accused Colorado theater shooting suspect James Holmes can call two unidentified witnesses at next week’s preliminary hearing to testify about the defendant’s “mental state.” Arapahoe County, Colo. prosecutors had...

Where the heck was I going with this...?  Some sort of conspiracy theory rant...

Squalene: The Swine Flu Vaccine’s Dirty Little Secret Exposed

Squalene: The Swine Flu Vaccine’s Dirty Little Secret Exposed

This has been gathering dust in my Drafts.  Posting it now.  Can't even remember what it was about...

Ben Gardner's Boat

Jaws soundtrack stands out at one of the most terrifying soundtracks ever, particular the sequence from Ben Gardner's boat, which is amazing in that the shark isn't even in that sequence (just a freakish rubbery head...)

11:00 + the creepiness begins as they find the abandoned boat...
12:24... descent
13+ Shark theme. No shark, but plenty freaky. Who goes diving into the ocean, at night, when there's a great white out there somewhere...?

Sunday, March 24, 2013

"Enchanted", a stupid, irrelevant Disney feminist apology for the classic "Snow White"

Squinty has written a few too many posts lately, so need to get up to speed here.

I've been thinking lately of the excruciatingly-bad Disney film "Enchanted" lately, which can be thought of as less of a movie to waste time watching with the kids, but rather as a pathetic and humiliating insult to the tradition of the classic Disney Snow White film, which to me remains to this day the finest, incomparably animated film ever.  Of course this film is offensive, and has rabid feminists and others up in arms.  Snow White is a princess who wants nothing more than to marry a prince.  I love it!  No complex, frustrating, impossibly-intelligent, unlikable, proto-feminist, indestructible Reese Witherspoon-types, but rather just a princess who wants nothing more than to wed a prince.  Brilliant.  Perfect.  

With Enchanted, it's like the screen-writer was an angry young woman, trained in the Sith arts of rabid feminism in college, with a fresh social studies BA, who sat down and typed out how the classic Snow White "should" have actually ended, with the princess coming to New York and realizing she doesn't need a prince to be happy, but rather, she needs to be single and successful running her own business.  This was appalling writing and perhaps the stupidest distortion of a classic movie theme I've ever had the misfortune of watching.  Absolutely awful.

I will give Disney credit, though.  They have never stupidly attempted to make a "Snow White 2" (that I know of) and they have left the original alone, as the one film that cannot be ruined with stupid and shallow remakes involving SW trained as a warrior with a huntsman while she has a fling with the film director, or something like that.  

But if Disney did ever decide to make a "Snow White 2", rest assured it would be stupid, and that it would rot in the Disney vault along with "Enchanted."

The original Snow White is a marvel:  wonderful story, staggeringly-good animation (without any lazy Disney computer-animated shortcuts) and a charming soundtrack of both orchestral and vocal numbers.  It's unquestionably a classic, and you can tell by the duration of this film even today: they continue to make rides at the Disney theme park based on this film (haven't seen any films made based on "Enchanted".... maybe they could make Mr. Toad's Commode Ride", in which you ride through a sewage pipe lined with discarded copies of Enchanted...?)

Thursday, March 21, 2013

bad bigfoot encounter

bigfoot was messing around near my camp. i set him on fie and he went off a hollerin. he came back with other bigfoot fellers and they tore down my tent and ate my bags of cornmeal. all that left me thinkin that my days of racoon huntin aint all that wonderful after all. maybe time has come to pursue my dream of being an english teacher

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

bigfoot agin

bigfoot was chewin on my coonskin hat to i had to shoot him. roasted him with bbq sauce and some corn. gray fellers with big heads and black eyes - like a dolls eyes - werent to happy none about me poppin their pet bigfoot so i popped them too. lost a shiney nickel somewhere in them thar hills

Monday, March 11, 2013

location of where i hid the gold and a sack of cornmeal

(the semi-deceased) Squinty Whistles Journal

went to corncake summit in colorado made corncake for competition that i was sure would win. i used gin. i lost. got angry and hunted some raccoons. shot about fifty. sales guy in the hills sold me a raccoon trap. said take my time take a little extra time with no obligations. said i was a jet-setter. not sure what a jet is or where i should set it. slept outside. drank a gallon of rain water and ate some raccoon jerky.